I haven’t blogged for aeons! It’s been around six months since I last blogged. So much has happened in these six months. I am now an engineer – BE Mech. It feels good. My last six months in college (BITS – Goa) were an absolute blast! Quark, Waves, Spree, all in one semester! Walkie-talkies for backstage members was fun :-) . I made a bunch of new friends, and came closer to those who earlier happened to be just acquaintances. I learnt (and started using) a load of very weird sounding slang (which, mind you, is unique to BITS – Goa). Some BITSian slang, in their (hopefully correct) usage are noted below, and, while a few may be common in other parts of India, I assure you, each phrase has multiple meanings, many of which I have not been able to list here.
In BITS, BDM, Pinky, Shalini, Aruna & Co. would be pleased and proud (NOT!!) with our attempt to include classroom grammar rules in daily conversation. Naturally ‘lol’ becomes ‘loler’; and if you find the ‘zoke’ very funny, you’d say ‘lolest’. Very very funny would be ‘lolest-est’. It is obvious…oh! sorry – it is ‘ob’ that such grammatical extrapolation can be used for other words – ‘ob’, ‘obber’, ‘obest’, ‘obest-est’? If you find this tiny task in English tough, then you’d surely be ‘raped’ in our examinations. You’d probably come out saying ‘Damn! Paper ne phaad di. Rapest paper!’ Or maybe, ‘paper ne f*ck maar diya’? The sad thing is, that in BITS, exam ke samay life mein f*ck ho rakha rehetaa hai.
If you are one of the chosen few who manage to turn the tables on the paper then you are ‘proest’. You’d go around the campus shouting ‘backslash-m-forwardslash’! ‘backslash-m-forwardslash’ or ‘Yaar, life mein sex ho rakha hai’! Otherwise, by the second paper most people take it lite (light). A friend of mine once commented upon the marvelous way these two phrases – ‘life mein f*ck ho gaya’; and ‘life mein sex ho gaya’- actually mean the same, an yet are completely opposite in terms of how they are used.
Regardless, by the third paper, if lite has not been taken by you, then tum noobism kar rahe ho; faaltu mein apni maraa rahe ho, kyunki abhi tak toh sabka ‘gg’ ho gaya hai. Finally when you get your corrected papers, the only excuse you can make to your parents is “Mama, lol ipoindi. But chintaa mat karo, baaki sab ka bhi ‘gm’ hua hai, in other words, sab ne m2l2”. ‘m2l2 (right here I was facing this dilemma – should I capitalize the ‘m’ in ‘m2l2’ since it began a new word/acronym after the full-stop? I decided against it, since the quandary I would be in next would be the issue of capitalizing the ‘l’ in ‘m2l2’ – I’ve upper-cased the ‘m’, so to maintain an evenness, it would only be right to upper-case the ‘l’. But then that might distort the acronym so much that this much loved phrase would be unrecognizable – M2L2. I say ‘much loved’ because I know that through careful cogitation people have extended this to m5l5 and even m6l6. I must point out that m2l2 actually started out as m2l2. It only changed into its present form to aid quick typing on DC main chat). DC is absolutely ‘ulti-mate’! Many chaps are called by their DC nicknames, rather than by their real names – Tillu, Rash, Achillies, Sid bloke. There are cases where people don’t know the real names of these people! If people don’t know your real name, then you simple have to take lite, and chill, machha!
Anyway, I am back home in Gurgaon now, and have a lot of free time on my hands. Just yesterday I met up with some really close friends – Prawn-soup and Sanso. We met up to hang out, and in the course of time, as most college-goers are wont to do, landed up at Café Coffee Day – CCD where Sanskriti had the following conversation with the waiter:
S: Could I please have the chocolate cake?
W: Chocolate cake?
S: Yes, please.
W: Anything else?
S: No, thanks, that’s it (big Sanso-smile)
W: Would you like it with warm?
Sanso, Pranshu, Rohit (to themselves): What the …?
(aloud): Umm, excuse me?
W (louder and slower, as if that would help!): Would you like it w-i-t-h-w-a-r-m?
R: Oh, you mean would we like it warmed?
S: Aah yes! (Bigger Sanso smile)
R: maybe we could ask the waiter to give us a portion of ‘warm’ in a separate dish? Maybe with two spoons? :-P